Action. It's been almost a week since I've been telling to myself: "Time to get my life together" What I've failed to realize is that the process has already started, and right now in this present moment is where i'm making progress. We've came to this perspective of "Oh if i do this, it means i actually did something" Or like some sort of Motivation that will INSPIRE you and wake you up from your slumber to fix your life or something. But no, that's not how it works. Action (witout a second thought) is the first step to reaching the end point. Doesn't matter what the end point is, or whether you accomplished it or not, what does matter is the process of getting to the end point. That's what gives you the "motivation" or the "flow state" as you wanna put it. And the first thing to that, is action. Without action i don't think so there's any meaning to reaching your goals...you can't just expect yourself to reach that goal by sitting and laying on your bed watching YouTube Shorts all day. Yes, I'm talking about my current self. Sure i made some progress and I'm actually happy about it but continuing this Lifestyle of procastination and not taking action is not it. It never was and never will be. Trust me. Do something you really want to do. Something that you actually care for, not something other's will care FOR you. It is 3:24 P.M of 9/20/2023.. with my Lptop battery being busted as it won't work unless plugged in...you still can do something. Even if you have one working eye at the moment. You can still do something. It could be anything, but just take the Action.

Alone It's not about changing who you are, you don't have to change yourself for holding on to people who aren't really your type or similar to you, go ahead and talk but if it starts to become draining you can stop. You don't have to continue just for the sake of seeming like someone who loves hanging out. If you're more happy with being alone to recharge yourself, so be it (even if people point you out for an introvert) It's more mentally draining to be someone you aren't than someone you are and being called out for it. Enjoy your own time, stay on your pace, take care of yourself. That's more than enough. Being alone doesn't mean you're lonely... you're only lonely when you tell your mind that you are. Try acknowledging your negative thoughts but don't spend more time on it. Just acknowledge and dispose of it. It's going to be mentally challenging sure but it's way better in the long run, just make sure you're consistent with it. Without the consistency, you'll keep falling back to your overthinking and people pleasing.

Chasing your Dreams. Here's a question for you "Who is the type of person that accomplishes his goals, doesn't contemplate on his set backs, who believes he can achieve all his wants/wishes by acting upon it, be a proper example of success, has children that look up to him" What if i told the answer was simply, you. You're that person. To be that type of person you must know what that type of person does to be as he is. It isn't easy to know or find someone like that, but it's simple to be him. Not easy but simple. All you have to do is put the effort and behave like the person you aspire to become and soon, you'll surely turn out like him. Coming back to chasing your dreams... We ballin'

Dealing with Discomfort. What comes to your mind when you first think of Discomfort? Something I'm not used to dealing with or something different from my views. There's plenty of things that could deny discomfort but now's not the time to get into it, mainly due to the low amount of brainpower i have at the moment...... Anyhow, coming back to the topic, i feel like there's certain types of Discomfort that could be talked about. For example: Mental discomfort = Doing a certain task even if you don't feel like doing it, it causes you to question yourself or tell yourself "(I) could be sleeping in the couch right now instead of doing (this)" But the beauty of mental discomfort is that it doesn't last for long, it just stays until the moment you actually overcome it. You feel much more fullfilled and better once you finish your task, instead of passing it down to your future self, expecting him to finish it. Sounds familiar doesn't it — the above explanation is called Procastination if you didn't know. The thing about procastination is that you don't really feel like doing the work at the "current moment", but once you force yourself into doing it, you realise it wasn't much of a big deal. It was just a mental barrier. And to surpass the mental barrier, aka having to leave your comfort zone, you must first go through discomfort. Which is why i took the example of procastination for mental discomfort. Now coming to physical discomfort, I really can't say much because all i've felt was frustration due to not working out consistently or following a healthy diet for no longer than 3 months, or getting proper sleep.. All these come under both Mental and Physical discomfort. My views may defer over time but that shouldn't change the fact that you grow more when you go through discomfort in your life, and if i ever think otherwise, I'd be damned.

Problems If there's something bothering you and you address it to me, what should be the basic reaction? If you're mad about me using my computer 24/7, every day of the week and tell me that we don't do anything in the week ends.. wouldn't my solution be to reduce the time I spend on the computer and first find out why I even spend time on it in the first place...? So if my response is to acknowledge it without saying anything against you, disconnect my pc and putting it aside so that it's clear I want to do something to fix that "Pc addiction" even if it means putting my work aside and editing crap because obviously that's not what I do right? Doing all of that results in you being mad at me again...? For trying to make a change..? Doesn't really make sense does it. What do you really want me to do then? just a random dumb, don't expect any of these in the future

Procrastination - Ruff If you think in this way: "Oh well the last day of submission is 2 weeks later, i have alot of time" Then 2 weeks later you realise you still haven't finished the assignment and during the 2 weeks you have been crying and worrying about only the work. So now instead of waiting until the last 12 hours worrying and doing the assignments last minute, why not do it for 1-2 hours every day until its done. Start splitting/breaking the big task into smaller items so that it seems much easier to do and less threatening. You realise it's actually managable and easier to do later on. Do as much as possible in one day so that you can get the free time later on without worrying about it. With the free time you can record videos or do the things you want to do while getting the good grades in the end. Don't leave the work until the end, leave it for the next couple of hours. If you just sat down and focused without any distractions, the better you get at doing the work you don't feel like doing. *Just start* — that is how you kill procastination. "People wait for the perfect conditions, but starting IS the perfect condition" — Ruff Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KKLn74qQGZ8&t=205s

Screen-time. As I'm writing this, I've been awake since today morning [03-12-2024 / 7:00] and been glued to either my phone, or my laptop's screen for almost the entirety of the day (It is 9 PM right now). Sure, the day went by pretty well, with me putting together a shoe rack all by myself and all but there was not a single moment where I stepped back and decided to take a few minutes for myself. Just constantly feeding my brain information i'll forget soon after the day ends. The amount of entertainment you consume throughout the day really concerns me, Joel. Almost 6 hours a day on the phone, and around 4-5 on the computer. That's around 2 months of your year, and i'm not even kidding. There's so much left to do and learn yet you decided to watch "one" more video, or play just "one" more game. I'm not stopping you from playing or anything, go on ahead by all means. Have fun, get some rest, all that stuff... but when you're not doing those, just sit down and give your brain some time alone. It needs it desperately, you need it.

social media is really killing romance https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QVqBRYnnb30 No joke, social media now has made romance sound like a cringey joke, even while I was dating (both online and offline), There was just too much bias towards how love is prescribed/looked up on. Everything said on social media should fr be taken with a grain of salt (or a whole bucket of it lmao) Want advice for relationships? The last place you'd want to go is online. Learn from experience or from someone you can trust. Not anonymous people who don't know shit.

The beauty of music "Music on it's own, is a form of emotion." And I stand up to that statement. It's something that cannot be described entirely, but at the same time describes everything there is to be said. There's just this sense of understanding whenever something's being played. For example, Flawed Mangoes - Riff 2. Or Gibran Alcocer - Idea 22. Both of these individuals are below 25 years old, yet they're capable of conveying some of the most beautiful emotions on this planet. It's not to say that what they produce is the best of the best, that nothing can beat it. But in a way, that is true.. My true intent was to just listen to and enjoy listening to things others produce, though somewhere along the way it has turned into me wanting to make music. Whether it be through someone else's work or by my own. I just want to produce something by myself. For this reason, I don't really want to share the fact that I purchased an electric guitar.. not to anyone. ANYONE. Sure, it may come to the day where I just brag about it or say it out of spite but, I really just don't want to say anything about myself anymore. The past few months all that's been happening is my talking about my experiences and choices and opinions without really caring about other's. Which is why I want to convey my emotions through my videos. Through music. Through anything other than word of mouth. that's the beauty of music.

The end Funny to say that it's the end but I'm pointing out the fact that's it's the end of this year. The end of 2023. A year full of emotions, worry, laughter, fun, pain, anger, emotion-less times...and much more. Surely, there were times where i thought to myself why am i even living at this point but it was all worth it. It was worth it because I've stayed strong until now and faced whatever came my way. Grateful for all the times my family and friends were there for me, grateful for the lost friendships and learning lessons because without them, i wouldn't be who i am right now. Grateful for the random out bursts of energy and the sillyness that no one could understand, except the people who did. Grateful for the surgeries i underwent, thankfully it's healing better now. and lastly, grateful for the opportunities i got, regardless of whether i took them or not. For all i know now, is to take the opportunities whenever i get the chance, and if "chance" doesn't appear by itself, it's on me to CREATE it. Tho it really pisses me off i haven't still earned 10k by the end of this year :/ so i'll double down on it and make sure i earn 20k by the end of next year. :>

Thoughts and Regret Thoughts are funny to me, not because i find it absurd to think or something haha...imagine though. It's funny to me because i hate thinking, anytime i think it's always either about something that isn't relevent to me or always something entirely of me, both being on the negative side. Occasionally i do get proper positive thoughts and they make me realise that not all thoughts that i have are all negative or have to actually mean something to me, some are totally random while some are so proper and well thought out that i wonder if i should study at harvard or yale lol. This probably makes no sense as i'm typing this out freshly out of thought (aka what my brain is saying) Realised that it's normal that your brain thinks shitty negative stuff like that and it's sort of alright, i can't expect myself to be perfect mentally and have the brains of a high standard muscular gaint who meditates in an ice bath for 2 hours a day in -30* weather. Well that was random. And it's fine. Thought right now the "thoughts" I am reffering to are the ones regarding my past and future. The one's where i wonder if i could've done something different for a different outcome. Now that's absurd. I shouldn't be thinking about what i could've done, i should be thinking of what i can do now so that i don't have to think like this again later on in the future. Get it? Sounds big brain like megamind or something but it's that simple. Do and follow proper things right now so that you don't regret right now. Ask yourself (if you think about past relationships): Do you want to regret it, or do you want her to regret it? Sounds selfish and cocky i know but again, if its for your own gain...while also letting them go, why put it onto yourself? Ask yourself (if you think about academics): What can i do now to improve my grades, instead of being stuck with my current level of interest in studies? Sounds uh...idk was nice in my head lol anyways go study fr.

Thoughts dump: - Silence is not the key to happiness. - "Think, but do not Imagine" - Not everything will have a meaning or a "purpose" - Thinking is fine as long as it's not overthinking - "Be motivated enough to set goals and disciplined enough to achieve them" - Put in the work, even behind the scenes when no one is watching.

Thoughts from your death bed Okay imagine this, you are 88 years old and struggling to move around and maybe even on the verge of death. What kind of thoughts do you imagine then? Thoughts on making dinner for the next day or checking how to make the most money? No. You'll have thoughts on wanting to be young again and having regrets of not taking that action to improving my physique, or approaching that girl and telling her she looks cute. These are the thoughts that come up most of the time and you will just want to die already to stop thinking of them. But now imagine, you did all the things you thought of doing (Good things). Like learning how to play the guitar or lifting weights in the gym/home or even just studying for 1 hour at home and not procastinating assignments....think of how fulfilled you'll feel. In the end you won't "WANT" to die, you just won't "MIND" dying because you feel like you've done your part in life and now all that's left is the final moments. I'm not saying this to be suicidal or just to regret on things, you're still 17. Although there's no time, there's time. There's time to improve right this second, without any distractions and uncertainities you can make it. Instead of wasting time, USE it. That's all that'll matter in the end, how you used up your time. -- Exurbia

what am i doing wrong im thinking of cancelling my plans on sunday (dinner) i made some new friends recently and they invited me out with them and some of their friends (17 people) and the problem is... yesterday talking to a mutual i found out she was the ex of one of the people i named when she asked me whos coming and now shes not coming after knowing that, i feel insanely guilty cuz the friend who organized it specifically made sure that they both wouldnt know whos coming cuz they both are his friends it wouldnt be fair if i went, and also yesterday i came to college for gym, some assignments and had a good time honestly, but the car was with me the ENTIRE day so my mom kept on getting pissed then later in the evening i was dropped at church with my moms plan being going to the movies with my brother in the car and grabbing dinner after the movie but due to traffic they couldnt go and i didnt see the dinner message on time so she had to cook at home now she was alr pissed about it how can i have my time and enjoy my life if i cant spend time with my own mother. and i have to pick up someone else ON sunday for the dinner so idrk. i have a feeling she'll WANT to come to drop me and then take the car while i planned on taking the car the whole day I'll be busy on sunday as well, 10-12:30 church, then meeting at 2:30. then dinner at 4:30, i'll be home at 7-8 fuck me theres so much going on im so overwhelmed

Priorities Think about this properly because what you've been lacking lately is not the perfect routine or a partner that supports you, right now all you don't have is proper priorities. 1. God ✝️ 2. Mental Health 3. Physical Health 4. Family 5. Studies / Communication

What do I want to do Do the things I own and buy justify themselves because they makes me happy? Does getting that guitar but not learning how to play it make me feel good. And buying that new camera for the only feature you don't get on phones make you a better filmmaker? What makes you think buying that motorcycle will make you happy if you aren't fully utilizing what you already have? You used to experiment, try and work hard with what you had. That trashy 4 core processor and gtx 1650 being pushed to its limit on premiere pro. The Canon 500D and S23 being extracted to its core to make sure you were satisfied with the results. Sure, you did try them out. But are you really making full use of them. Because honestly I don't think I am. Even though those things are right in front of me, I'm not going outside and making sure to at least practice using them... you now realise your first step on what to do. Even if you cannot work, at least max out your skills and hobbies.. the time to play video games, watching youtube and stuff isn't very entertaining anymore so just admit it that you're just being lazy. You don't want to create reels and chase likes do you? You want to CREATE and make youtube videos. That's where you first started... remember? So chase those things and stop looking back. Keep your games for the weekends, and weekends ONLY.

What does Story-writing mean to me? After watching dozens of YouTubers sharing their experiences and life moments through story telling, i've developed an interest to do the same thing. I feel like, story telling is a spectacular way to share your experiences with your audience, it doesn't matter if its an experience of your own, or something that everyone goes through or any certain topic that catches the attention of the viewer. I just feel like it has to be something you can openly talk about without any doubts or misjudgement of it, it doesn't really matter what the other's opinion about it is, it matters what it means to YOU. Apart from actual controversial things that aren't supposed to be talked about of course, can't cancel myself before even starting out. Most of this might not make any sense honestly because I'm just a 17 year old college freshman who's still yet to discover and experience actual "life", but again, if it matters to me, that's all it matters. Sounds pretty egoistic actually but hey -who cares- The art of story telling isn't only limited to experiences or things that have a certain "meaning", yes, quote on quote meaning. I'm really sure that i want to join this lifestyle of documenting/recording moments of my life that i can share with a select audience, not for pure entertainment, but for something I can look back to and say to myself "This was worth going through." — Inspired by: Life of Riza · ItzSimon · Colt K. · wholesomesimon · Max Rei. · Nathalie · Keo Tsang

You are what you think. And I mean it literally. You are what you eat, think and do, Joel. Every single thought and idea or obsession or action you take progresses you to the thing you constantly think about. (or away from it) So choose. CHOOSE what you want and focus ONLY on that. If you don't know why I'm talking about this, just think of the one thing you always do and feel like you enjoy in the moment but then instantly regret it after you've done it. Remember now ey? Everything has its time and method to do it, you can even change -how- you do it to make it more enjoyable. But you never, and I mean it, NEVER change yourself to do that thing sooner than it has to be done. Don't rush something. Everything has it's own time, doing it before you're destined to do it makes it less enjoyable while you are doing it. Looks like I've talked about two things now, but please Joel. Remember these 2 things very clearly.